Tag: Self compassion

The Point of Receiving

I’m sure you’ve all encountered a relationship situation where your person has finally owned up to his/her wrongs and apologized. It may even have been quite humble and very heart-centered; however, you simply were not at the point of receiving because the pain inflicted needed to run its course in order for you to be open to your person’s apology.

Just because someone finally sees his/her error, doesn’t always mean we have reached the point of returning to center. What mostly determines this is how often the offense has been committed and what came from the previous times. When we are repeatedly faced with the same disrespect or lack of compassion, care or respect, it can get more difficult to return to status quo because our limits are being reached and our patience is running out.

It’s important for both parties to know that sometimes the “offended” might need a minute. Not only is the “offender” learning in this situation, but the “offended” is learning too. Spiritual growth often takes processing time. All situations are designed for us to grow and learn from. What that looks like from person to person and situation to situation can vary greatly. Our job as an empowered (worthy) person is to take the time needed to feel our way through while staying connected to Source so we can come out of the situation better for having experienced it.

Relationships are so important and so incredibly relevant on our spiritual path of evolution. They are designed to show us ourselves. If we did not have them, we wouldn’t have the mirror so needed to reflect back our ways – good and not-so-good. How we handle and transcend what comes about is paramount to our personal growth, future empowerment and success of our relationships.

I’m not saying we have permission to hold grudges and stand in stubborn attitude.

I’m saying that giving yourself permission to return to center organically through process and connection is okay. This is about honoring your sacred self. If you are still hurting and can’t quite seem to meet your person at their apology (yet), you are only doing what is necessary to heal and return to the relationship whole. Returning as “half” isn’t going to cut it in the long-term. It would be like taking a short-cut that leads you in a circle.

With a deep understanding of this process by both parties, relationships can overcome some serious disconnection.

It’s all about respect and compassion for where your person is at.

I’m always so inspired and humbled when another accounts for his/her wrong doings. I see the Spirit in my beloved seeking higher, wanting more and desiring to overcome his/her fears and choosing differently next time. And even still sometimes it takes me a bit to process through my own emotions regarding the situation. The same goes when it’s the other way around. If I have offended and owned, I allow my person to return to his/her center on their own time as well. I do my best to give them the space and time needed to work through the emotion all the while trusting in the love between us.

Relationship offenses happen. They just happen. It does not mean our person is beyond redemption (nor are we), nor does it mean the world is going to end. It means we have come together in this relationship/situation as a means to evolve our sacred self to a higher level.

Standing in complete self-worth during these historic moments is a prime way to show our person that we love ourselves enough to not condone someone who does not honor us. When we are strong enough to say “enough”, we open the door for our beloveds to see their own darkness, their own fears and their own disconnection from Source as well.

A truly humble person standing in full responsibility understands this. He/she knows that trust was broken, pain was inflicted and time is needed. If your person attempts to manipulate or bully you into instant acceptance, there is most likely an alternate motive behind his/her apology. If this is true, it’s not your job to make him/her take ownership. It’s your job to stand in your self-worth and take care of you first no matter what. Your well-being is your responsibility and by making good choices rooted in your worth, most often your beloveds will see their error and make their amends.

Your thoughts?

From Doormat to Sweet Empowerment Introduction

from doormat to sweet empowerment book cover

Dear Empowerment Seeker,
After a major life upset brought me to my knees, I set course to heal the unhealthy relationship patterns repeating in my life. I didn’t know how this was going to happen, but I was willing to do whatever it took. It took me two years (by myself) of dedicated work to heal what I now recognize as shame and unworthiness recovery. The results of my work were so astounding, so life-altering, I realized I had cracked the empowerment code.

There is a shame and unworthiness epidemic that plagues humanity. Our healing points show up in our people-pleasing (doormat), approval seeking, controlling, self-protection, mask wearing and desperate behaviors. We all (males and females) have wounds that require healing to attract and maintain the life and relationships we’ve always craved. My goal for writing this book is to help you shorten the learning curve so you can experience your dream life as soon as possible. I’ve done it and I can help you get there.

I have taught this concept to hundreds of people and those truly dedicated to the work, achieved their goal! Healing doesn’t just happen by wishing it so. We must be willing to take radical responsibility for our lives, intake and study new concepts then retrain our conditioned mind by applying what we’ve learned. Healing work is not “difficult”, it’s simply a new method of operating. I sectioned this book into 9 Modules. A module is defined as any number of distinct but interrelated units from which a program may be built. Each module in this book is a component of Shame and Unworthiness Recovery. All equally important.

All stories are true life situations of my own, coaching/consulting clients, friends and family. All names have been changed to protect and respect the privacy of others.
Although I now passionately teach shame and unworthiness recovery, I am a work in progress. I continue to take responsibility for my life, expand my knowledge and practice new concepts and tools. Empowerment is not a destination; it is a way of living.

I invite you, the purchaser of this book, to read the text slowly, high-light concepts you’d like to revisit, complete the exercises, journal your thoughts and apply what you’ve learned. Keep moving forward no matter what!

Always remember, life is a process. Healing is a process. Change is a process. Be gentle with yourself while on your journey. Stay your course, encourage and congratulate yourself often and most importantly, honor yourself for the unique and sacred individual that you are! You are deserving and capable of living a beautiful life!
I am extremely honored to assist you on your healing path.

I believe in you!
Kristen