One of the most frightening things a doormat can encounter is the first few times he/she sticks up for him/herself or makes a decision firmly rooted in self-love. This moment can feel so wrong! It can feel way out of bounds and definitely way outside our comfort zone! But that is just it! We need to break our old patterns and step courageously out of our comfort zones. Our comfort zones are the reason we have accepted the unacceptable and are living a minimal life in the first place.
So far, this pattern has only repeatedly created the same type of scenarios over and over again in our lives. If we want something different, we must choose to DO something different. Most often, we know exactly what we should do, but we refrain for fear of the unknown, rocking the boat or potentially losing another’s love. No one said beginning to live an empowered life was going to be easy. It WILL take courage. The good news is, we all have it! We just have to choose to locate it and put it into action.
The most common belief a doormat will say is, “…but I feel selfish if I do for myself.” There is absolutely NO selfishness in self-love. Period. There simply cannot be. Where there is Light there cannot be dark. Love is Light and selfishness is dark. Get it?
What most doormats don’t know is that when we begin to make empowered decisions (decisions rooted in a healthy self-worth), we actually create a magnificent ripple effect. Within this ripple effect we:
a) Teach others what is no longer acceptable, thus creating better treatment from others.
b) We serve as an example to our children and peers how to choose better for ourselves/themselves.
c) We shift our energy from lack to abundance and unworthy to worthy. *All life is energy. This is more powerful than you may think.
d) We begin to attract new and better opportunities and people into our lives.
e) Our strength and boundaries become growth opportunities for others around us because our empowerment will no longer enable our beloveds, but encourage and support their own growth.
Additionally, we begin to notice how most often our boundaries are perfectly accepted by others. There was no love lost, no over-turned ship and the unknown we were fearing, turned out to be a more peaceful soul and a better sense of worth and purpose. The very thing we held ourselves back from was the precise thing we needed to do to enhance our lives and bring us closer to joy and our dreams.
In closing, please remember this…. You don’t have to create your new life in one day. Take it one decision at a time. Allow yourself to strengthen and heal your worth more and more as you go. I assure you that what you will find over time is your empowered decisions become easier and easier until they simply become a part of you.