Category: Gratitude

Encouragement Over Advice

I recently attended a seminar where the speaker kept correcting  members of the audience.  When they asked for her “advice”, she quickly changed the word to “encouragement.”  When I heard that, a resounding YES!  sprang forward in my mind.  I have always been uncomfortable with the word “advice”.  Somehow it implied that I was better than another or all-knowing and it came laden with a certain type of pressure.  There was a certain degree of self-sabotage that came with that word for me.

When I decided to become a coach/mentor, never did I think I was any more “special” than another.  The true push was that I had discovered a way out of the unworthiness that was driving my life and I felt on fire to help lift others out of their suffering as well. I wanted everyone to know the personal freedom and love that was available to us and just how to get there!

The truth of what I do as a mentor and coach is to help remind others who they are, to trust what they already know is true for them and to ENCOURAGE their courageous warrior within.  This does not make me better than anyone or some sort of guru.  It only means I chose victory over circumstance and prevailed.

In retrospect of my life, I realized that the encourager I am is a gift.  It’s not something I cultivated or practiced.  It is something that I have always done. It dates as far back as I can remember.  It’s part of me.  It’s my DNA.  In fact, it is so natural to me that I often assumed that everyone was this way and had many times felt hurt when I felt no one had my back or “got” me so to speak.

As time passed I realized that some people are good encouragers and others simply are not.  It wasn’t for me to judge them for they had other spiritual gifts to share with the world.  It was my responsibility to seek out mentors and teachers that built me up instead of relying on my expectations of others. Instead, I sought out others who had been where I am and had just the right words to encourage my courage to move forward and try doing something differently.

When I heard the speaker switching those two words, I knew had found a better feeling place for myself.  A potential block, keeping me from growing my business and reaching greater heights, was diminished in 20 seconds flat.  The pressure that one tiny word put on me was gone for good.  I don’t give advice, I give encouragement.  I help others recognize their worth and make empowering choices that will lead to a better fulfilled life.

In gratitude to my teachers of yesterday, today and tomorrow.  Thank you.

From Doormat to Sweet Empowerment Introduction

from doormat to sweet empowerment book cover

Dear Empowerment Seeker,
After a major life upset brought me to my knees, I set course to heal the unhealthy relationship patterns repeating in my life. I didn’t know how this was going to happen, but I was willing to do whatever it took. It took me two years (by myself) of dedicated work to heal what I now recognize as shame and unworthiness recovery. The results of my work were so astounding, so life-altering, I realized I had cracked the empowerment code.

There is a shame and unworthiness epidemic that plagues humanity. Our healing points show up in our people-pleasing (doormat), approval seeking, controlling, self-protection, mask wearing and desperate behaviors. We all (males and females) have wounds that require healing to attract and maintain the life and relationships we’ve always craved. My goal for writing this book is to help you shorten the learning curve so you can experience your dream life as soon as possible. I’ve done it and I can help you get there.

I have taught this concept to hundreds of people and those truly dedicated to the work, achieved their goal! Healing doesn’t just happen by wishing it so. We must be willing to take radical responsibility for our lives, intake and study new concepts then retrain our conditioned mind by applying what we’ve learned. Healing work is not “difficult”, it’s simply a new method of operating. I sectioned this book into 9 Modules. A module is defined as any number of distinct but interrelated units from which a program may be built. Each module in this book is a component of Shame and Unworthiness Recovery. All equally important.

All stories are true life situations of my own, coaching/consulting clients, friends and family. All names have been changed to protect and respect the privacy of others.
Although I now passionately teach shame and unworthiness recovery, I am a work in progress. I continue to take responsibility for my life, expand my knowledge and practice new concepts and tools. Empowerment is not a destination; it is a way of living.

I invite you, the purchaser of this book, to read the text slowly, high-light concepts you’d like to revisit, complete the exercises, journal your thoughts and apply what you’ve learned. Keep moving forward no matter what!

Always remember, life is a process. Healing is a process. Change is a process. Be gentle with yourself while on your journey. Stay your course, encourage and congratulate yourself often and most importantly, honor yourself for the unique and sacred individual that you are! You are deserving and capable of living a beautiful life!
I am extremely honored to assist you on your healing path.

I believe in you!
Kristen