Category: Self-Love & Self-Worth

Why Your Boundaries are Not Working

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“I keep setting boundaries and they are not working!” Said the distraught and frustrated person.

Boundaries are often misunderstood and therefore, improperly used. Thus, having little to no effect on the disrespectful or hurtful situation you are trying to remedy. So, let’s have a little Boundary 101 lesson on what boundaries are, why they are not working and how to set them effectively.

Step One – Setting a Word Boundary  

This will look something akin to…

“I feel disrespected when you often make me the butt of your jokes in social settings. I’m requesting that you please stop doing it.”

Your person will respond in one of two ways:

(a.) Understand and honor your request which allows both parties to continue forward happily. Or…

(b.) Disregard your request and continue to do it.

With response (a.) you’re good to go!

With response (b.), unfortunately, you’re not finished yet…

Many people think a boundary is set only with words and if you’re lucky, it will be. But if our person chooses to disrespect our Word Boundary, we must be prepared to back up our words with action.

Step Two – Setting an Action Boundary

The difficult part about Action Boundaries is oftentimes the most effective action/boundary we could choose may be the hardest or scariest one to set. We are terrified what might happen or what we’ll lose if we stand behind our words with action. Thus, we repeatedly use words over action in a feeble attempt to feel “safe” by disrupting as little status quo as possible. This is where we become the most frustrated.

Ugh… I don’t want to go further with this. Why can’t my person just heed my [word] boundary?!

The answer is simple. Because your person is not motivated or has reason to introspect or adjust him/herself. (Self-reflection is something many people avoid like the plague unless motivated or inspired to do so) Additionally, you have shown your person over time that your worn-out words mean nothing. They can continue to say and do as they please because there are no consequences.

what you allow

By providing a “consequence” or action behind your boundary, you will provide the necessary motivation and inspiration to introspect because they will lose something of value if they continue with the same behavior.

Setting healthy Action Boundaries is in direct proportion to our level of self-worth. When we have a healthy self-worth in place, a firm boundary is easy-er because our joy, worth and value are not reliant on another person.

Healthy self-worth says: I understand my value and won’t allow another person to minimize it no matter what. My job is to take care of me.

When we are continually hurt or disrespected, we have two choices only:

Put up with the crap. Yay, I get to live with this for eternity.

Or

Remove yourself or something from the relationship/situation until your person acquiesces to your respect request. There is hope this situation will change!

Action Boundary Sample:

 “I will no longer attend _______ with you because I will not put myself in position to be disrespected by being the butt of your jokes.”

And don’t attend again.

Ever.

Unless or until Mr. or Mrs. Disrespectful stops making you the butt of his/her jokes.

Are you getting the picture here?

For a Boundary to reign success, the offender must feel a consequence of their action. Otherwise, they will have no reason to introspect into why he/she is being a shit in the first place.

Boundaries Serve Both Parties

The best and most awesome part about boundary setting is it can serve both parties. Our boundaries and clear sense of self-worth can shine light on our person’s dependencies, controlling tendencies or disrespectful behaviors and potentially start them on their own healing path.

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It’s important to remember what others are doing is oftentimes a pattern set in place long ago and they may not even be aware how detrimental their behavior is. When they begin to receive the message enough, they will eventually have little choice but to take a good hard look at themselves.

Above all else, remember this…

If words are not working, back them with action.

 You matter.

You always have.

They will not respect you until you respect you by setting a boundary that says: I’m worth more than that!

Get it?

I knew you would.

Ladies: Is Your “Number” Getting Too High?

tic marks

There’s a pop culture term for the amount of people we’ve had sex with. It’s called “your number”.  The mere fact this is a thing within our youth, says a lot. People are always paying attention to how we conduct ourselves sexually.

Historically society has made promiscuity okay for men, but multiple partners takes on a completely differently meaning for women. Throughout the centuries, one might typically be called a whore or a slut if her number is too high suggesting she is giving away the “cookie” (as Steve Harvey refers to it) too often and easily.

However, I see a high number in a completely different way. So, let’s take the words whore and slut out of this conversation because judgment will only interfere with this very important message.

Without even knowing you personally, I can bank on a few reasons why you continually give up the cookie too soon:

  1. You believe sex will secure the relationship.
  2. You believe a man’s sexual desire for you means he is interested
  3. You have no idea how truly valuable you are.

Most men are driven by a primal need to disperse his seed. It is built into his physiology to procreate. He is easily turned on visually and when touch is added, he’s quickly pushed to the point of no return. Most often he will do or say anything to get what his body is craving. Remember the Meatloaf song “Paradise by Dashboard Lights?

Considering these hard facts, it’s almost stupid how easy it is to get a man to have sex with you. (To be frank, it’s really no great accomplishment)

Then once in throes of tongues, thrusts and sweat, the cookie-giver tends to think: Look how much he wants me. I’m special and different than all the other women. He won’t be able to live without me!

Until he loses interest and stops calling. Ouch.

goodbye

Why? Because to a man sex is never about securing a relationship. Period.

There’s a sad truth afoot here, ladies… men can pretty much get their rocks off with anyone, even with himself.  You are not special and you are not different than any orgasm before you.

At least not yet!

When we have sex with a prospective partner too soon, we mistake his sexual desire for love and affection. Sure, he may think you are cute and funny, but he hasn’t even gotten to know you. All that happened was you provided an outlet for his innate primal desire.

Even if he does stick around for a bit, he hasn’t connected to your personality, your values or your soul. He wasn’t given the time. The only thing that’s been established is you are willing to screw. Is that really what you want your worth to be judged by?

I didn’t think so.  Please read on.

The point when a man truly connects with and commits to a woman does not come from sex. It arises organically when the woman keeps a steady pace of abstinence until the man has earned the right to be with her.

I’m not making this up. Any emotionally healthy, self-aware man will tell you this.

Emotionally healthy men are highly attracted to and stay with women who are confident, know their worth and formulate healthy boundaries for him to honor and respect.

Unless or until you start treating yourself as valuable, your number will continue to increase without the payoff of a lifetime partner you so desperately crave.

Let’s break this down into 3 Simple Truths:

Simple Truth #1:

Your vagina is not your worth.

 If you could readily adopt that idea, I’d stop writing right now. But chances are you don’t yet fully understand.

Stop listening to the BS society and the media throws at you. Your eyebrows, hair, clothes, toenails and fancy Cirque de Solei sex positions is not what secures an emotionally healthy man. He may enjoy those things, but they will not ensure a lifetime commitment. Sure, there are superficial dudes out there who only care about how you look on his arm, but all you will ever be is a thing to make him feel better about who he is.

Not really what you’re looking for is it?

Simple Truth #2:

A man wants a woman who is authentic, open-hearted and acts in alignment with her own worth.

After years of poor choices and behaviors stemming from my own unworthiness, I learned a man is truly looking for a woman to feel safe with. Yep, you heard me! He craves safety and intimacy just like you do.

A woman tossing out the cookie left and right does not yield safety I assure you.

A safe woman is one who understands her value and is willing to act in accordance with her worth thus becoming a shining beacon amidst a tumultuous hurricane of cookies flying everywhere.

When a man feels authentic truth, self-worth and integrity within a woman, he will do what it takes to secure her to him. This is the point she becomes special and different. And if he doesn’t, he is not a man of integrity and you should move on as fast as possible.

Simple Truth #3:

Men desire connection and safety just as much as women.

An emotionally healthy man will choose a woman who makes him feel safe over a flamboyant romp in the sack every time.

Have you ever stayed in a relationship too long waiting for him to commit only to watch him marry the next woman he meets? What did she have that you didn’t? Oftentimes, a man doesn’t even know what he is looking for until that glowing, confident, self-assured women whirls into his life. She can be a game changer for even the most steadfast of bachelors.

foundsafety

Sisters, there is a way out of the ever increasing “numbers” game and into the arms of a wonderful man so listen up.

Step One: Recognize you have a pattern of giving up the cookie-too soon.

Step Two: Let yourself off the hook. You are not a whore. You have only mistakenly believed that you could gain love by offering your body. Give yourself grace and forgiveness for acting in a way that did not support your highest self.

Step Three: Stop dating until you do the work to heal your self-worth and unequivocally know you are able to protect and support your sacred self in your next relationship.

And always remember there is nothing more attractive and stimulating to an emotionally healthy man than a woman who values herself.

Stop Feeling Guilty for ‘Me Time’ – It’s Actually Benefiting Your Children

I woke up the other day feeling a bit antsy and irritable. Since that is not typical Kristen character, I checked in with myself by asking:

What’s missing? What do I need right now?

The answer was emphatically clear. I need more me time.

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I knew immediately I had fallen into the guilt trap a-gain! Because guilt is the only reason I refrain from taking me time. Straight up, no chaser.

Six years post tsunami, two years rockin’ a new book, a successful coaching practice and multitudes of self-empowerment blogs and articles in my portfolio and I still fall prey to the guilt monster. ((sigh))

Here’s what the despicable beast sounds like:

You need to be available for your family all of the time.

You cannot take care of yourself until everyone else is set.

You’re last on the list.

Everyone’s needs trump yours.

Do any of these thoughts sound familiar to you? If yes, read on, my friend!

Yesterday I had a fabulous conversation with my dear friend, Sherry. I shared how guilt stops me from doing the things I want to do for me. Things that expand my soul, grow my spirit, fill my life and make me feel good. Sherry understood far too well as she too experiences the same voices in her head and allows them to control her actions as well.

In fact, Sherry suffers from a chronic illness right now that oftentimes puts her to bed for days. She expressed to me how she often pushes past the needs of her body to alleviate guilt she would feel for taking care of herself. Which only then exacerbates her weakened state and categorically adds days to her down time.

Sherry and I agreed we both would have benefitted from more quality attention in our youths and due to our desire to do things “better”, we’ve overcompensated in a bad way.

Mommies, what are we doing to ourselves?!

Here’s what I know for sure.

Over-correcting is not the way to do it.

Giving ourselves away at the expense of our own well-being and self-care never serves anyone. It runs us ragged while it may enable our children to be self-serving, demanding, unable to work out their own problems, unable to keep themselves occupied and/or keep them locked in a state of instant gratification.

Keep in mind they don’t have to act like Veruca Salt to be exhibiting these behaviors. They can be subtle and manipulative as well. Believe me, our kid’s got our number!

Disclaimer: This does not mean we have horrible children. They aren’t purposefully trying to drain the life out of us. They’ve been tended to from birth and unless we set boundaries, they will continue to seek our tending because they won’t know any better.

You see, when we compromise our sacred self, we sacrifice our self-worth and we simply will not show up as the lightest and brightest version of ourselves.

It’s impossible because we are not tending to ourselves as a whole. It’s like washing, waxing and polishing only half of a filthy car. We only show up a fraction of our full potential.

The first sign I recognize when I’ve been putting myself last is irritability. Then I notice a deep internal pull to be doing something else. I feel empty, antsy, half-interested, detached, going through motions, pretending I’m listening but zoning out and the worst part is the feelings of resentment that sometimes come. The very thing I’m trying to avoid, I actually create!

Which then begs the questions:

Is it really better to give all of me away?

Are my beloveds getting the best  version of me when I’m not tending to my soul?

Are my children really getting a better experience than I had?

Am I teaching them patience, boundaries and self-care by running myself ragged?

When put like that, the answer becomes emphatically clear.

No.

Being a mommy doormat is not serving to our children or to us.

So let’s get off the problem and onto the solution. 

taketimeforme

What does it look like when we do carve out more me time?

For me, I’m more centered, engaged and relaxed. I don’t feel rushed or harried. I am better focused, happier, more patient and definitely more present. Hands down, I’m a better version of me when I take care of myself and stop putting everyone’s needs above my own.

I would be remiss if I did not mention that I understand everyone’s situations are different. I’ve seen a lot in my 26 years working closely with the public and I understand it’s not always easy to etch out the space we desperately need.

I want to encourage those of you who do have extenuating circumstance to do your best to whittle out some me time. If there is a will, there is a way! It might be uncomfortable at first as you work through your limiting beliefs and guilt, but I implore you to keep at it!

You cannot  be your best self if you are not treating yourself as valuable.

To all the mommas out there who find yourself pinched up and beginning to begrudge your role as mother, I implore you to heed the words herein. Do you want to be an average momma or do you want to be an exemplary momma?

Remember we are the greatest role models for our children. We have the choice to model doormathood or to model loving self-care.

Trust in knowing your self-care will benefit your children as much as it will benefit you!

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Here’s to guilt-free (if there is such a thing) parenting!

I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Much Love,

Kristen

How To Act When Dating Someone New – Today’s Question & Answer

 

Question:

When you first meet someone that you feel chemistry and connection with, how are you supposed to act?

You are supposed to act 100% yourself. Period. If we wear a mask of any kind portraying ourselves as something we are not, we run the risk of duping our partner into “liking” us.

Short-term we “win” the man, but long-term we’ve signed up for a partnership that was not built on truth. This is often where disharmony, affairs and/or divorce stem from. (Disclaimer: But by far not the only reason)

It is much better to be ourselves from Go rather than bob and weave between the lines of who we think our potential partner wants us to be. In doing that, we are dishonoring ourselves first and our partner second. Not a great way to start out a relationship.

100 % authenticity, baby!

I’m myself but I sense men still play games. I grew up with the concept that if a man wants you in his life he will make it happen.

I do believe if a man truly sees your value and wants to secure you (and he is commitment ready), he will make sure you know it. He will want to seal the deal so to speak so he does not have to worry about you being “out there”.

If a man is not securing his position with you there is reason to pause, rethink what the relationship is actually built on, what is acceptable to you and what you are truly desiring in a relationship.

You are responsible for your own happiness regardless what he decides.

But I’m a bit older now and my dating pool of men are divorced with children. So that white night drives a minivan now.  :) I just met someone who I am very attracted to, but he is not only divorced with two kids but his ex-wife recently moved across the country with their children. And to top it off he is a high ranking military man. I have never dated a military guy before and that is a whole other topic.

I invite you to release the need to attach labels, excuses and/or stigmas onto him. He’s a man and soul first before anything else. Deal with the person, his personality and behavior, not an imposed belief or stigma attached to his situation and current status.

We handle our relationships best when we believe what we are seeing through a clear filter, not the filter of an attached label or excuse attached to a label. 

Until then, pay attention to how he treats you. Are you being respected? Do you feel his interest? Are you high up on his priority list?

This is super new and I really like him but need to get to know him better.

Great idea! Although there are those moments “jumping in” works, it is a rarity in long-term success! When we release the need to rush, we allow for graceful unfolding – a true blending of energies and personalities. That is where the magic is.

I do want to show him I care and want him in my life but don’t want to scare him away. How would you advise in this type of situation?

A courageous and open heart will show care naturally. A heart that is “afraid” of scaring him away will give off energy incongruent with your true essence. Instead he might feel: neediness, insecurity or a “scripted behavior” which is not attractive to pursuers male or female.

Appreciation, light touches and your happiness and inner glow with him is encouragement enough for him to continue pursuing you.

When I think of him, I’ll send him a quick text. He has confided in me a little about his ex but I’m not sure if I should allow that or ask that he not discuss her with me. Isn’t it too soon to go there? Or is it?

My personal philosophy is there are no topics off limits.

We cannot get to know our person or anyone else for that matter, if we only discuss superficial topics. Getting to know someone on the core level requires open-hearted conversation around everything!

We can’t know what or who we are dealing with (and decide if it works for us or not) if we don’t enter into unknown space. Furthermore, if he’s not far out of the relationship, talking about it and processing space will be vital to his healing.

I fear I am going to mess this up even if he is the one with the heavier baggage.

Carrying fears into a relationship has the capacity to “mess it up” depending where both parties are at. Fear brings with it a dank energy. You might want to explore your shadow to see if your fear stems from an unworthiness associated with men or a sense of urgency or neediness that does indeed have the capacity to push him away.

My advice is to continually work on yourself. Fear dissipates when we know and love ourselves. This is the pathway to a mutual loving and respectful relationship. If you are unable to do this alone, contact a good coach or therapist to assist you.

I want to get to know him because I sense this could be really great. Call it intuition, but I feel there is something really special about him.

There is something special about him – he is God’s child just as you are. All relationships serve us in some capacity or another. Our person may be here for a reason, a season or a lifetime. Whatever the purpose may be, may we open our hearts to follow Spirit’s guidance and open our eyes to see the shadows this relationship will bring to the forefront for healing.

Everything is purposeful.


Beloved Sister, I’m honored you called upon me to hold space for you while you navigate through your confusion. I hope I interpreted your email correctly and this tidbit helps you in the highest way. Sending you much love on your journey!

~KB

Why Receiving Compliments Can Be Difficult- A Collaborative Column

kristen-bio Kristen Brown

In my 20’s, my “I suck” wound (unworthiness) was so big I could hardly look in the mirror because all I saw were my flaws – flaws I noticed myself and flaws that had been pointed out to me by others. No matter how wholeheartedly a compliment was given, it felt fake and untrue to me. Although I’d say “thank you” to be kind, I couldn’t receive it.

One day I read an article that said to ignore or push out a compliment was to turn your back on a loving gift. Can you imagine how it would feel if you wholeheartedly and excitedly handed someone a heartfelt gift and they said, “I don’t want that!”?

I know for me it would sting.

The article went on to say that when we graciously receive a compliment we are actually giving back to the giver because their heart becomes full with our receiving! In other words, their soul expands with their giving of love and our receiving of it.

Makes perfect sense doesn’t it?

So why is it we don’t easily apply this principle, graciously receive compliments and get with the program? Because…

When we don’t deem ourselves worthy of glory, we will not ever believe someone else does.

Many of us hold ourselves hostage to an unachievable standard of perfection. We believe: Unless or until I achieve (fill in the blanks) _____, _____ or _____, I will never be worthy.

Instead we are forever reaching, striving, straining and draining our way to reach a place we believe will finally make us worthy.

Loves, there is no amount of stuff we can acquire that will make us feel worthy. No amount of relationship, money, body or career status will ever fill the unworthiness void in our hearts.

Unworthiness healing is an inside job and here’s how it starts:

Know your true origin as a child of God – Equal to all living beings on this Earth. Not above, not below. Magnificent, unique and beautiful in your creation. God does not make mistakes and you are no exception.

Focus on what is right with you rather than what is “wrong” – We naturally begin to reflect our inner beauty and worthiness when we give ourselves grace for our mistakes and embrace our journey as one of learning and growing not of perfection.

Be your own best friend – Encourage yourself. Speak kindly to yourself. Forgive yourself and love yourself. Treat you the way you treat others. You need your acceptance, love and compassion just as much as your loved ones.

Receive the love coming your way – It’s there! Love is all around you! Open your eyes and heart to receive it. You are worthy of every compliment given. We came here to make manifest all that God is, to shine in our own special way. If someone is giving to you, open your palms wide and receive.

And most importantly…

Choose to see compliments as a reminder of your glory!

Kristen Brown is Sweet Empowerment’s page admin.  She is a spiritual and relationship coach/mentor who is on fire to help others heal their wounds and attract the life they’ve always dreamed of! If you would like to hire Kristen for personal coaching, click HERE for your free 15 minute consultation!

Sue BIO  Sue Markovitch

There is a chemistry principle called “Like Dissolves Like”, that describes how substances with similar characteristics will dissolve in each other. Salt shares similarities with water, so salt dissolves easily in water. Oil has the opposite polarity of water, so it does not. We’ve all seen oil floating on top, or in a separate layer from the water. It is because they repel.

For most of my life, compliments were oil to my water. I repelled them. If someone said, “You look great!”, I would grab a roll of belly fat and respond with, “Are you kidding? Have you seen this disgusting belly?” If someone said, “Your hair looks so nice like that”, I’d squirm around talking about how I’d gotten up late, didn’t have time to straighten it, blah blah blah.

Compliments were oil to my water. I repelled them.

Once I realized how rude it was to argue with someone, just because they complimented me, I tried to change. I would say, “Thank you!”, but it didn’t feel authentic. Compliments still made me feel seen, called out and vulnerable.

Then I started to learn about my wounds. My brokenness. I became aware of how rooted in Not Good Enough and I Don’t Matter I was. My solvent was composed of fear, so love bombs in the form of compliments could never really get in. They were always repelled, because fear and love are as opposite as oil and water.

Not being able to receive compliments is a symptom of fear and unworthiness, often rooted in shame.

I realized that I’d never be able to truly accept a compliment until I was made up of Love and only Love. It was chemically impossible. So I got to work. I started sharing my story. I started sharing my shame. I found amazing support groups and coaches who knew how to create a safe, sacred space for me to process all the shit that had happened. How I got so filled with fear and lies.

I started coming out of agreement with all the false beliefs that had been my life map for so long. And I got on a new path.

As I did the work of letting go of who I was not, and remembering who I was, I started to become rooted in Love. My identity was no longer Not Good Enough and I Don’t Matter. It was now a worthy, oh so loved Child of God. Once I knew who I was, when someone saw that glorious light within me and took the time to tell me with a compliment, I finally understood the salt.

And I saw the light in them right back, and said, “Thank you.”

Sue Markovitch is a Fitness Coach, Author, Speaker, Spiritual Leader and my beloved Soul Sister! If you would like to discover more about Sue’s awesomeness check out her website Clear Rock Fitness!

KelliHeadshot Kelli Davies

I am very fortunate to be married to a man who gives me compliments on a daily basis.

One morning we were having a deep conversation and he proceeds to tell me that I’m flawless.  It was all I could do to 1) not laugh, 2) tell him he was nuts, and 3) not rattle off a list of all the reasons his statement wasn’t true.

Although I refrained from saying anything, the look on my face said it all.  He said “You’re flawless in my eyes. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted”.

His statement almost made me cry because I knew he was speaking from his heart . He was looking at me through love filtered glasses. So why was I having such a hard time receiving his heartfelt words? Unbelief.

Unbelief that he saw me as complete.  Unbelief that he could look past my physical flaws and still see beauty. Unbelief that he could look past my character flaws and still see a great person.  Who am I to argue with what he sees?

When you’re not accepting, you are rejecting. You are rejecting a gift that is being offered to you.  It is a gift of acceptance, encouragement, and love.

Unbelief is also the reason we feel the need to explain why a compliment isn’t valid.  If someone compliments your shoes, you don’t need to ramble on about how old or how cheap they were.  Just say thank you! How long you’ve had or paid for them is irrelevant to how fabulous it looks.

On the flip side, if you’ve ever had to deal with someone who doesn’t know how to receive a compliment, it can be kind of annoying.  You just want to shake them and say “Snap out of it!  You have good qualities!”.

This speaks to a deeper issue. Is the root of your unbelief unworthiness?

Accepting a compliment doesn’t make you arrogant.  All it means is that you have chosen to believe that someone sees you through love filtered glasses.  It’s OK to receive the gift of acceptance, encouragement, and love.  It is up to you to believe that you are worthy.

Kelli Davies has spent 20 years working closely with the public as an aesthetician/makeup artist whose current work home is Prova Salon in Scottsdale, AZ.  Kelli is a church going,  self-empowerment loving, spiritual gangster!  Kelli’s spiritual journey has invoked a deep passion in her to encourage and speak life into others as they travel through life challenges.

20160617_131442-1_resized  Lisa Marquis

How do you take your compliments, straight up or with a side of squeamish?

When someone compliments you, say, on what you’re wearing, your sense of humor, your beautiful eyes, how do you respond? Do you say thank you very much, or do you minimize what they’ve just said? Shy away from them, deny that it’s true?

If you have trouble accepting compliments, perhaps you are suffering from low self worth. You fear it will make you look conceited or full of yourself to say thank you. It’s just always what you’ve done when being complimented: deflect so as to seem humble.

When we deny a compliment aren’t we somewhat insulting the giver of it? After all, they are making a point to let us know that they like something about us, so isn’t it up to us to be gracious about receiving it? The answer is yes. We should be gracious and accept, but it’s  more than that. We need to improve our self worth, so we can actually believe and appreciate that compliment.

I think we are afraid of the compliment because it puts us in the spotlight for that moment in time, draws attention to something about us. And lots of us just aren’t comfortable in that light. Either because we doubt ourselves, don’t feel good about ourselves or just plain don’t like to be focused on. Or as mentioned above, it feels like we are full of ourselves to be in that place and we don’t want others to perceive us that way.

Daily affirmations can help with the issue of self worth; try saying to yourself that you are worthy, you are kind, pretty, funny, whatever you can come up with that you even remotely like about you. Then focus on the things that you think are your strongest attributes; maybe you are really great at your job, or have a way with people that is really disarming and engaging. It will be easier to start with your strongest qualities and go from there, as those are easier to grab onto. Doing this will also help you with where you need improvement.

Telling yourself what’s good about you doesn’t make you conceited. It doesn’t make you perfect, it makes you aware. It goes toward being grateful. I happen to be very good at my profession, but it doesn’t mean I never make mistakes; when I do, I have enough belief in my abilities to learn from them and move on. And it makes me grateful for the lesson. Boom. Compliment accepted, from myself! That’s what a daily affirmation is, a compliment to you, from you.

Just try it. It will be awkward at first because we’re so used to the deflection and denial. But as you keep at it, you will see that starting with you is the first step to bringing a better you to the rest of the world.

Lisa Marquis is a practicing Hair Stylist, Truth Seeker and aspiring Author! Lisa’s divine gifts of logic and compassion coupled with her articulate, sweet and oh-s0-witty demeanor, make her one heck of a space holder. If you would like to follow Lisa on her Facebook biz page, click here: Straight Up Hair